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A Dog Named Buhari and A Hippo Named Patience by Reno Omokri

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I never believed that true life is stranger than fiction until I read the case of Joe Fortemose Chinakwe, the young man who named his dog after his hero, Buhari, only to be arrested and detained by the Nigerian Police on the excuse that his actions were likely to breach the prevailing peace in his community of Sango-Ota, Ogun State.

Really? Is this how low Nigeria has sunk? 

About two weeks ago, Chinakwe’s hero, President Muhammadu Buhari, ordered the police to reopen the cold case murder mysteries involving Bola Ige, a former Attorney General of the Federation and Chief Aminasoari Dikibo, a one time ex-Deputy National Chairman, South-South, of the Peoples Democratic Party.

Little or nothing has been heard from the police since that order was given only for Nigeria to wake up to the almost telenovela tale of a dog named Buhari. When they are meant to deliver results, the police is busy delivering activity. Comical activity.

Perhaps what I find most interesting is that a man can be arrested for naming his dog after his hero yet in this very same country no one thought it wrong when the First Lady, Aisha Buhari, called a man, and not just any man, but a governor at that, a ‘mad dog’!

Now I get it! In today’s Nigeria, you can name a man after a dog without consequence but you cannot name a dog after a man without consequences!

Do you see how low Nigeria has fallen? Perhaps our police would like to visit the netherworld to arrest the late English novelist, George Orwell, for naming the pig in his allegorical novel, Animal Farm, after the French Emperor, Napoleon Bonaparte.

Didn’t Chinua Achebe write that “when an adult is in the house, the she-goat is not left to suffer the pains of parturition on its tether.”

But why should I be surprised? Hasn’t Nigeria degenerated to become an ‘Animal Farm’? Just like in Orwell’s novella, we are living in a country where animals have displaced humans.

Why won’t our morals become warped to the extent that we care more for animal rights than for human rights when elders like Professor Wole Soyinka did not see anything wrong in calling the wife of a seating President a ‘Hippopotamus’?

Why won’t our morals go to the dogs when our government is more interested in protecting the rights of cows via grazing reserves rather than protecting the lives of its own citizens by way of prosecuting killer herdsmen, who, as our president assures us, are from ‘Libya’? These marauders, who have killed thousands of innocent Nigerians in the last 18 months have for some reason become so bold even as our security agents have become so timid before them.

And the case of Joe Fortemose Chinakwe exposes a troubling pattern. We seem to have a government that cares more for the right of certain categories of foreigners than for the right of its own citizens.

Why do I say so?

Well consider that the complainant who lodged a complaint with the police against Mr. Chinakwe is allegedly a foreigner from Niger Republic (by the testimony of Mr. Chinakwe). On the strength of a complaint by a foreigner that he feels offended by the name a Nigerian chose to give his dog, the Nigerian police swung into action and became so efficient overnight that it sent its men to fetch the erring Chinakwe and locked him up for his audacity.

Then also consider that the herdsmen (notice I said herdsmen, not Fulani herdsmen) that have killed thousands of Nigerians are said, by no less a personality than our President, to be foreigners from faraway ‘Libya’ and perhaps other nations in between.

Now we have established the pattern. But why is the pattern troubling?

It is troubling because it is beginning to seem that when the interests of Nigerian citizens clash with the interests of certain classes of foreigners, the interest of the foreigner prevails over the interest of the Nigerian.

And there are more instances to prove my hypothesis.

I was recently in Nigeria to preach at a church in Abuja and I noticed that foreigners clear through immigration faster than Nigerian citizens at our airports. At foreign airports the reverse is the case. Citizens clear faster than foreigners.

I am betting that I am not the only one who has experienced this anomaly.

What is it with Nigerians? It is this same attitude that makes us worship anybody with a foreign accent. We do not like ourselves and we like foreigners and yet we expect foreigners to like us.

Foreigners are not fools, you know. They will find it difficult to like us if we do not like ourselves. After all we know ourselves better than they know is, and if we do not like ourselves then that sends a red flag to the foreigner.

And to the Nigerian police, let me say that the popular flutist Tee Mac Omatshola Iseli has a dog named Obasanjo (seriously, he does). Should he also prepare for arrest?

What more can I say? Nigeria never ceases to amaze!

Omokri is the founder of the Mind of Christ Christian Center in California, author of Shunpiking: No Shortcuts to God and Why Jesus Wept and the host of Transformation with Reno Omokri

Joachim-Chinakwe

 

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After Meeting NGF Chairman, Akpabio Apologies To state Governors Over N30bn Claim

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The President of the Senate, Godswill Akpabio, has finally apologised to the Nigeria Governors’ Forum (NGF) under the leadership of Governor Abdulrahman Abdulrazaq of Kwara State over his comment on the N30bn allowance allegedly given to them to cushion the effect of inflation in food prices.

This was coming after the Senate President held a meeting with the NGF Chairman and some of his counterparts in Abuja yesterday.

Akpabio had, at a plenary sitting last Tuesday, said an “unverified report” indicated that state governors received N30bn each from the Federation Account to cushion the effect of inflation and the high cost of food prices.

The statement has generated controversies in the public space, with some commentators asking governors to come clean about the money they did not collect.

However, on Monday, Akpabio in a statement by his Special Adviser on Media and Publicity, Eseme Eyiboh, retracted the statement, saying the SP held the governors in high esteem.

The statement reads below:

“During the session, the President of the Senate commented on the payment of an unverified cumulative sum of about N30bn to the sub-national governments by the Federal Government for various interventions to ameliorate the food situation of our citizens at the sub-national governments.

“The unfortunate conjectures to take away the kernel in the material facts of FAAC payment are rather regretted. In considering the well-intended motive of urging state governments to collaborate with the Federal government of President Bola Tinubu to facilitate strategic interventions to mitigate the prevailing economic situation in the country remains the underpinning motivation in the comment.

“The President of the Senate is not oblivious to the fact that state governments are functional partners in all the efforts of the current administration of President Bola Tinubu and are also valuable stakeholders’ in the various legislative engagements of the legislature in creating the nexus between the legislature and the people.”

Eyiboh added that Akpabio has always demonstrated commitment to team building and shall not do less in the circumstance.

He, therefore, urged the sub-national governments not to be distracted by any misunderstanding of the context and true meaning of the statement.

He added, “The President of the Senate recognises and appreciates the current efforts of the governors at ameliorating the adverse effects of the current inclement socio-economic environment and therefore invites more hands on the plow to complement the renewed hope agenda.”

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Police arrest wanted Abuja kidnapper, Dahiru after Wike’s N20m Bounty

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Operatives of the Federal Capital Territory Police Command have arrested a wanted notorious kidnapper, Saidu Abdulkadir, popularly known as Dahiru Adamu.

This comes barely three days after the FCT Minister, Nyesom Wike placed a N20m bounty on the suspect and one other wanted kidnapper, Abu Ibrahim.

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PHOTOS: FG welcomes Super Eagles with breakfast

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The Super Eagles have arrived in the Federal Capital Territory after their second-place finish at the just concluded African Cup of Nations final.

Players including Alex Iwobi, Ahmed Musa, Victor Osimhen, Ola Aina, Frank Onyeka, Calvin Bassey, Ademola Lookman, Kenneth Omeruo, Joe Aribo and Williams Troost-Ekong were at the welcome breakfast at Transcorp Hilton, Abuja.

Members of the coaching crew are also at the breakfast.

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